Yesterday, Spaceship One made the first of it's two flights to win the X-Prize.
One short flight for a pilot, a giant leap for private space flight.
Where sci-fi meets politics - Klingons for Kerry
Democrats might be pleased that they're getting the votes of tough guys. Republicans might joke that with the "Swiftboat" ads in mind, fighters endorsing Kerry would be science-fiction.
In the news, Virgin Airways' boss is considering space tourism.
"Sir Richard says it will cost around £100,000 to go on a 'Virgin Galactic' spaceliner, and the first flights should begin in about three years' time."
So will space be "Virgin territory" for private industry?
new meaning to the term "doggie dish"
from topgreetings.com
In the news, a "Japanese gadget turns plants into speakers."
So now the "talking heads" on the news can broadcast from heads of lettuce.
(outtakes)
"Human players of The Sims, which gives them control over virtual people, can now have their creations run their own cities full of virtual people."
"This has become possible thanks to a classic version of the SimCity game made for The Sims by keen player Steve Alvey."
"Sims that do a good job of looking after their tiny, virtual city can earn a living from it as mayor and will slowly see their city grow in size as more citizens flock to it."
And perhaps one of those smaller sims is also playing a SimCity game, in turn looking after thousands of even smaller sims. And one of those smaller sims is also playing a SimCity game, in turn looking after thousands of even smaller sims ...
"The Sims" has found a nemisis, "lethal guinea pigs."
"Sloppy Sims who do not clean the cage of the guinea pig and get bitten by the filthy beast are falling ill and, in some cases, dying. To make matters worse sick Sims that do not rest and recover can infect other Sims."
The gamemakers have been developing a patch so that nobody croaks from the illness. Until then, sims better watch out for "death by guinea pig."
About the fly-eating robot being developed, there is one slight hitch. "The robot will most likely have to attract the hapless flies by using a stinking lure concocted from human excrement."
Now there's an idea that stinks.
"To survive without human help, a robot needs to be able to generate its own energy. So Chris Melhuish and his team of robotics experts at the University of the West of England in Bristol are developing a robot that catches flies and digests them in a special reactor cell that generates electricity." - News Item.
"What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall in that room. No, wait! AAAAAAHHH!" - Mark Stanley
About the 98 year old just now getting a computer ...
"Windows 98, for 98 year olds"
The proprietor of a bar in our town keeps a sensitive plant (Mimosa pudica) on his premises. When this plant is touched, the leaves fold and the stems droop. Recovery is prompt, and the action can be repeated endlessly without harm to the plant. When the bartender feels a customer has had too much to drink, he gives him an "alcohol-sensitive test" by having him touch the plant. He warns that if the plant wilts when it is touched, the drinker should not drive. The inebriated patron is usually so startled by the plant's action that he willingly calls a cab.
from Lorraine, topgreetings.com
In the news, AOL announced a plan to sell cheap computers to low income folk (provided they agree to buy their services for a time).
(*DING*) "You got ... junk."
Bill Gates my father is not. As church treasurer, he had two files, one labeled "St. Mary's Income" and one labeled "St. Mary's Expenditures." While copying them from a Macintosh to a PC, he had no idea the PC would automatically truncate the file names to ten characters, eliminate spaces, and replace apostrophes with periods.
Now the church's income is stored in "St.Mary.sin" and expenses in "St.Mary.sex."
from Clean Laffs
In the news, a NASA solar probe crashed.
"Hollywood stunt pilots had been waiting to catch the capsule in midair to give its cargo a special soft landing." Instead, it's parachute failed to open, and it smashed into the ground.
"Hey! This wasn't in the script."
when the Borg get hold of a tribble
In the news, a "98 year old becomes computer fan" - news item
She "uses it to play cards and shopping."
No word on what music she downloads.
"Cordless phones are great...if you can find them."
Glenn Foster - from Clean Laffs
from topgreetings.com
In the news, for those who can't make it to the minster on Sunday, a virtual church parish
So if your computer crashes, is that a "virtual rapture?"
While listening to an oldies radio station, my six-year-old evidently got the 60's mixed up with the 21st century. Instead of singing along, "Goin' to the chapel/ And we're gonna get married," I heard him sing, "Goin' to the chat room/ And we're gonna get married."
from Clean Laffs
